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1. Journaled and discoursed in the style of Anne of Green Gables. Held the opinion that Gilbert Blythe from the movie version had an annoying way of saying “Anne, I’m sorrrrry.” But he was still kind of cute. RIP, Jonathan Crombie.

2. Had a crush on Christian Bale thanks to his minor but tragic role in Henry V and more importantly, his almost-naughty-boy-next-door charm in Little Women.

3. Re-watched the Christian Bale-Wynona Rider kissing scene in Little Women multiple times, ostensibly to laugh at the drool the director missed.

4. Did not like Leonardo DiCaprio, because “everyone” else did. See also: boy bands of any kind.

5. Other than Christian alternative boy bands, such as Jars of Clay.

6. Counted down the days until church, when you got to see your crush. This was way before the days of Facebook, or you would have been FB-stalking the heck out of him.

7. Danced to the soundtrack of Last of the Mohicans and daydreamed about marrying Hawkeye. Marrying — like that hot scene where he makes out with Madeline Stowe, only within the holy bonds of matrimony.

8. Fast forwarded the bathing scene in Much Ado About Nothing. You can see nude buttocks when you fast forward, but you’re still doing the right thing.

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